"All Men are like grass" 1Peter 1:24

How can life not be taken for granted? How can a person appreciate each moment, each friend, each note, each kiss, every day - truly?

I still feel the warmth of those I call dear friends through emails, blogs and the occassional precious phone call. Yet I find that I'm aching inside and the worst is that I know these special people have left a hole inside that no one can ever fill or replace. The new friends just start a new corner in my heart because the old spaces are taken- occupied- forever. Should I have spent more time in dorm room conversations until 3am? Should I have done the bare minimum with my school work so that I didn't have to miss an unforgettable night out or a spur of the moment trip to Dunkin' Donuts? Freshman year I was so completely sleep deprived that while walking on campus on more than one occasion I truly feared I may collapse without a moment's notice due to utter exhaustion. Nights on the bunk bed talking with Myndi about everything until 4am when she had 8am Math 10. Learning how to ride a unicycle in the FARC hallway with Tim Murray. Trying to understand Music theory and write a proper melody with Chris and Kevin. Downloading on Napster until my eyes stung from the lack of blinking that occurs when staring at a computer screen entirely too long. Riding my bike home from the music building at 2am and hearing the birds singing in the trees like it was morning. The first snow on campus and the snow ball fights that came quickly after. The ice storm that left me flat on my butt in front of Lowry Mall. My first college house parties, the craziness of East Campus, the excitement of a new start, new friends that quickly became family.
I was so fortunate to effortlessly find friends that I connected with so naturally and that I bonded with so completely. Even if I don't talk to some of them for ten years, when I do, we'll still have tons to talk about. I ache because I fear that I will never find this again. I may have wasted some of the most precious time in my life; my time with amazing people. Rich in culture, different opinions, different talents and passions, all coming together into something truly unique and wonderful. I want one more night in the dorm room. I want one more party at apartment 105 or the Chat. I want one more Bible study with amazing women who dared to care about the truth and finding it for themselves. I hate to look back with regret on times in my life, yet in this situation I just can't get past it. If I ever didn't give you enough time, I'm so sorry. If I never let you know how special your friendship is to me, know today. I miss you terribly. I love you and you will always be on my mind and hold your place in my heart. Today, and lately, it's been aching.

Ladies of FARC, the Chateau, and the Nancy Anger Bible study, this one is especially to you.